Category: Humour

A Tramp Abroad

Name: A Tramp Abroad
Author: Twain, Mark, 1835-1910

Twain, Mark, 1835-1910 · 101 chapters · 156,087 words

Holsatia--Hamburg--Frankfort-on-the- Main--How it Won its Name--A Lesson in Political Economy--Neatness in Dress--Rhine Legends--“The Knave of Bergen” The Famous Ball--The Strange Knight--Dancing with the Queen--Removal of the Masks--The Disclosure--Wrath of the Emperor--The E...

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Chapters

100. CHAPTER L

I wonder why some things are? For instance, Art is allowed as much indecent license today as in earlier times--but the privileges of Literature in this respect have been sharply...

101. did. For instance, there is the word VERMIETHEN (to let, to lease, to

hire); and the word VERHEIRATHEN (another way of saying to marry). I heard of an Englishman who knocked at a man's door in Heidelberg and proposed, in the best German he could c...

70. CHAPTER XXXV

A great and priceless thing is a new interest! How it takes possession of a man! how it clings to him, how it rides him! I strode onward from the Schwarenbach hostelry a changed...

53. CHAPTER XXV

Next morning we left in the train for Switzerland, and reached Lucerne about ten o'clock at night. The first discovery I made was that the beauty of the lake had not been exagge...

80. CHAPTER XXXVIII

We went into camp on that wild spot to which that ram had brought us. The men were greatly fatigued. Their conviction that we were lost was forgotten in the cheer of a good supp...

56. CHAPTER XXVIII

The Rigi-Kulm is an imposing Alpine mass, six thousand feet high, which stands by itself, and commands a mighty prospect of blue lakes, green valleys, and snowy mountains--a com...

78. CHAPTER XXXVI

We did not oversleep at St. Nicholas. The church-bell began to ring at four-thirty in the morning, and from the length of time it continued to ring I judged that it takes the Sw...

79. CHAPTER XXXVII

After I had finished my readings, I was no longer myself; I was tranced, uplifted, intoxicated, by the almost incredible perils and adventures I had been following my authors th...

97. CHAPTER XLVII

We spent a few pleasant restful days at Geneva, that delightful city where accurate time-pieces are made for all the rest of the world, but whose own clocks never give the corre...

69. CHAPTER XXXIV

We hired the only guide left, to lead us on our way. He was over seventy, but he could have given me nine-tenths of his strength and still had all his age entitled him to. He sh...

66. CHAPTER XXXI

We now prepared for a considerable walk--from Lucerne to Interlaken, over the Bruenig Pass. But at the last moment the weather was so good that I changed my mind and hired a fou...

50. CHAPTER XXII

From Baden-Baden we made the customary trip into the Black Forest. We were on foot most of the time. One cannot describe those noble woods, nor the feeling with which they inspi...

54. CHAPTER XXVI

The Hofkirche is celebrated for its organ concerts. All summer long the tourists flock to that church about six o'clock in the evening, and pay their franc, and listen to the no...

22. CHAPTER VIII

Much as the modern French duel is ridiculed by certain smart people, it is in reality one of the most dangerous institutions of our day. Since it is always fought in the open ai...

40. CHAPTER XIX

However, I wander from the raft. We made the port of Necharsteinach in good season, and went to the hotel and ordered a trout dinner, the same to be ready against our return fro...

98. CHAPTER XLVIII

In Milan we spent most of our time in the vast and beautiful Arcade or Gallery, or whatever it is called. Blocks of tall new buildings of the most sumptuous sort, rich with deco...

84. CHAPTER XLII

Switzerland is simply a large, humpy, solid rock, with a thin skin of grass stretched over it. Consequently, they do not dig graves, they blast them out with powder and fuse. Th...

93. CHAPTER XLIII

Everybody was out-of-doors; everybody was in the principal street of the village--not on the sidewalks, but all over the street; everybody was lounging, loafing, chatting, waiti...

65. CHAPTER XXX

An hour's sail brought us to Lucerne again. I judged it best to go to bed and rest several days, for I knew that the man who undertakes to make the tour of Europe on foot must t...

82. CHAPTER XL

I am not so ignorant about glacial movement, now, as I was when I took passage on the Gorner Glacier. I have “read up” since. I am aware that these vast bodies of ice do not tra...

42. CHAPTER XXI

Baden-Baden sits in the lap of the hills, and the natural and artificial beauties of the surroundings are combined effectively and charmingly. The level strip of ground which st...

94. CHAPTER XLIX

After breakfast, that next morning in Chamonix, we went out in the yard and watched the gangs of excursioning tourists arriving and departing with their mules and guides and por...

55. CHAPTER XXVII

Close by the Lion of Lucerne is what they call the “Glacier Garden”--and it is the only one in the world. It is on high ground. Four or five years ago, some workmen who were dig...

99. CHAPTER XLIX

One lingers about the Cathedral a good deal, in Venice. There is a strong fascination about it--partly because it is so old, and partly because it is so ugly. Too many of the wo...

9. CHAPTER II

We stopped at a hotel by the railway-station. Next morning, as we sat in my room waiting for breakfast to come up, we got a good deal interested in something which was going on...

67. CHAPTER XXXII

We located ourselves at the Jungfrau Hotel, one of those huge establishments which the needs of modern travel have created in every attractive spot on the continent. There was a...

39. CHAPTER XVIII

In the morning we took breakfast in the garden, under the trees, in the delightful German summer fashion. The air was filled with the fragrance of flowers and wild animals; the...

38. CHAPTER XVII

A mile or two above Eberbach we saw a peculiar ruin projecting above the foliage which clothed the peak of a high and very steep hill. This ruin consisted of merely a couple of...

24. CHAPTER X

Three or four hours. That is a long time to sit in one place, whether one be conspicuous or not, yet some of Wagner's operas bang along for six whole hours on a stretch! But the...

81. CHAPTER XXXIX

A guide-book is a queer thing. The reader has just seen what a man who undertakes the great ascent from Zermatt to the Riffelberg Hotel must experience. Yet Baedeker makes these...

68. CHAPTER XXXIII

The beautiful Giesbach Fall is near Interlaken, on the other side of the lake of Brienz, and is illuminated every night with those gorgeous theatrical fires whose name I cannot...

41. CHAPTER XX

Next morning brought good news--our trunks had arrived from Hamburg at last. Let this be a warning to the reader. The Germans are very conscientious, and this trait makes them v...

51. CHAPTER XXIII

We were satisfied that we could walk to Oppenau in one day, now that we were in practice; so we set out the next morning after breakfast determined to do it. It was all the way...

96. CHAPTER XLVI

Mr. Harris and I took some guides and porters and ascended to the Hotel des Pyramides, which is perched on the high moraine which borders the Glacier des Bossons. The road led s...

52. CHAPTER XXIV

That was a thoroughly satisfactory walk--and the only one we were ever to have which was all the way downhill. We took the train next morning and returned to Baden-Baden through...

27. CHAPTER XIII

When we got back to the hotel I wound and set the pedometer and put it in my pocket, for I was to carry it next day and keep record of the miles we made. The work which we had g...

36. CHAPTER XV

Men and women and cattle were at work in the dewy fields by this time. The people often stepped aboard the raft, as we glided along the grassy shores, and gossiped with us and w...

14. CHAPTER VII

Perhaps the president of a corps notices that one of the membership who is no longer an exempt--that is a freshman--has remained a sophomore some little time without volunteerin...

37. CHAPTER XVI

Germany is rich in folk-songs, and the words and airs of several of them are peculiarly beautiful--but “The Lorelei” is the people's favorite. I could not endure it at first, bu...

83. CHAPTER XLI

One of the most memorable of all the Alpine catastrophes was that of July, 1865, on the Matterhorn--already slightly referred to, a few pages back. The details of it are scarcel...

64. CHAPTER XXIX

He kept his word. We heard his horn and instantly got up. It was dark and cold and wretched. As I fumbled around for the matches, knocking things down with my quaking hands, I w...

25. CHAPTER XI

The summer days passed pleasantly in Heidelberg. We had a skilled trainer, and under his instructions we were getting our legs in the right condition for the contemplated pedest...

11. CHAPTER IV

The summer semester was in full tide; consequently the most frequent figure in and about Heidelberg was the student. Most of the students were Germans, of course, but the repres...

23. CHAPTER IX

One day we took the train and went down to Mannheim to see “King Lear” played in German. It was a mistake. We sat in our seats three whole hours and never understood anything bu...

12. CHAPTER V

One day in the interest of science my agent obtained permission to bring me to the students' dueling-place. We crossed the river and drove up the bank a few hundred yards, then...

26. CHAPTER XII

The RATHHAUS, or municipal building, is of the quaintest and most picturesque Middle-Age architecture. It has a massive portico and steps, before it, heavily balustraded, and ad...

28. CHAPTER XIV

When the landlord learned that I and my agents were artists, our party rose perceptibly in his esteem; we rose still higher when he learned that we were making a pedestrian tour...

8. CHAPTER I

One day it occurred to me that it had been many years since the world had been afforded the spectacle of a man adventurous enough to undertake a journey through Europe on foot....

10. CHAPTER III

“When I first begun to understand jay language correctly, there was a little incident happened here. Seven years ago, the last man in this region but me moved away. There stands...

13. CHAPTER VI

The third duel was brief and bloody. The surgeon stopped it when he saw that one of the men had received such bad wounds that he could not fight longer without endangering his l...

95. CHAPTER XLV

On the 5th of September, 1870, a caravan of eleven persons departed from Chamonix to make the ascent of Mont Blanc. Three of the party were tourists; Messrs. Randall and Bean, A...

72. CHAPTER XXXVII A Calm Decision--“I Will Ascend the

Riffelberg”--Preparations for the Trip--All Zermatt on the Alert--Schedule of Persons and Things--An Unprecedented Display--A General Turn--out--Ready for a Start--The Post of D...

31. CHAPTER XVII Another Legend--The Unconquered Monster--The Unknown Knight

--His Queer Shaped Knapsack--The Knight Pitied and Advised--He Attacks the Monster--Victory for the Fire Extinguisher--The Knight rewarded--His Strange Request----Spectacles Mad...

18. CHAPTER XI Lessons in Art--My Great Picture of Heidelberg Castle--Its

Effect in the Exhibition--Mistaken for a Turner--A Studio--Waiting for Orders--A Tramp Decided On--The Start for Heilbronn--Our Walking Dress--“Pleasant march to you”--We Take t...

63. CHAPTER XXXV A New Interest--Magnificent Views--A Mule's

Prefereoces--Turning Mountain Corners--Terror of a Horse--Lady Tourists--Death of a young Countess--A Search for a Hat--What We Did Find--Harris's Opinion of Chamois--A Disappoi...

15. CHAPTER VIII The Great French Duel--Mistaken Notions--Outbreak in the

French Assembly--Calmness of M Gambetta--I Volunteer as Second--Drawing up a Will--The Challenge and its Acceptance--Difficulty in Selection of Weapons--Deciding on Distance--M....

32. CHAPTER XVIII Breakfast in a Garden--The Old Raven--Castle of

Hirschhorn--Attempt to Hire a Boat--High Dutch--What You Can Find out by Enquiring--What I Found out about the Students--A good German Custom--Harris Practices It--AnEmbarrassin...

33. CHAPTER XIX Arrive at Neckarsteinach--Castle of Dilsberg--A Walled

Town--On a Hill--Exclusiveness of the People--A Queer Old Place--An Ancient Well--An Outlet Proved--Legend of Dilsberg Castle--The Haunted Chamber--The Betrothed's request--The...

89. CHAPTER XLVII Geneva--Shops of Geneva--Elasticity of Prices--Persistency

of Shop-Women--The High Pressure System--How a Dandy was brought to Grief--American Manners--Gallantry--Col Baker of London--Arkansaw Justice--Safety of Women in America--Town o...

61. CHAPTER XXXIII The Giesbach Falls--The Spirit of the Alps--Why People

Visit Them--Whey and Grapes as Medicines--The Kursaal--A Formidable Undertaking--From Interlaken to Zermatt on Foot--We Concluded to take a Buggy--A Pair of Jolly Drivers--We me...

59. CHAPTER XXXI Preparations for a Tramp--From Lucerne to Interlaken--The

Brunig Pass--Modern and Ancient Chalets--Death of Pontius Pilate--Hermit Home of St Nicholas--Landslides--Children Selling Refreshments--How they Harness a Horse--A Great Man--H...

92. CHAPTER L Why Some things Are--Art in Rome and Florence--The Fig Leaf

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77. CHAPTER XLII Switzerland--Graveyard at Zermatt--Balloting for

Marriage--Farmers as Heroes--Falling off a Farm--From St Nicholas to Visp--Dangerous Traveling--Children's Play--The Parson's Children--A Landlord's Daughter--A Rare Combination...

17. CHAPTER X Four Hours with Wagner--A Wonderful Singer, Once--” Only a

Shriek”--An Ancient Vocalist--“He Only Cry”--Emotional Germans--A Wise Custom--Late Comers Rebuked--Heard to the Last--No Interruptions Allowed--A Royal Audience--An Eccentric K...

86. CHAPTER XLIV Looking at Mont Blanc--Telescopic Effect--A Proposed

Trip--Determination and Courage--The Cost all counted----Ascent of Mont Blanc by Telescope--Safe and Rapid Return--Diplomas Asked for and Refused--Disaster of 1866--The Brave Br...

1. CHAPTER I A Tramp over Europe--On the

Holsatia--Hamburg--Frankfort-on-the- Main--How it Won its Name--A Lesson in Political Economy--Neatness in Dress--Rhine Legends--“The Knave of Bergen” The Famous Ball--The Stran...

2. CHAPTER II At Heidelberg--Great Stir at a Hotel--The Portier--Arrival

of the Empress--The Schloss Hotel--Location of Heidelberg--The River Neckar--New Feature in a Hotel--Heidelberg Castle--View from the Hotel--A Tramp in the Woods--Meeting a Rave...

34. CHAPTER XX Good News--“Slow Freight”--Keramics--My Collection of Bric-a-

brac--My Tear Jug--Henri II. Plate--Specimen of Blue China--Indifference to the Laugh of the World--I Discover an Antique En-route to Baden--Baden--Meeting an Old Acquaintance--...

43. CHAPTER XXII The Black Forest--A Grandee and his Family--The Wealthy

Nabob--A New Standard of Wealth--Skeleton for a New Novel--Trying Situation--The Common Council--Choosing a New Member Studying Natural History--The Ant a Fraud--Eccentricities...

3. CHAPTER III Baker's Blue-Jay Yarn--Jay Language--The Cabin--“Hello, I

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47. CHAPTER XXVI Commerce of Lucerne--Benefits of Martyrdom--A Bit of

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74. CHAPTER XXXIX Guide Books--Plans for the Return of the Expedition--A

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29. CHAPTER XV Down the River--German Women's Duties--Bathing as We Went--A

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73. CHAPTER XXXVIII Our Expedition Continued--Experiments with the

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85. CHAPTER XLIII Chamonix--Contrasts--Magnificent Spectacle--The Guild

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