SCENE IV.

SHAPE, CHIRURGEON, MERCER.

SHAPE. He's a good friend of mine, and I presume Upon your secrecy.

CHIR. O sir, the deed By which it came was not more close. D' y' think I would undo myself by twitting? 'Twere To bring the gallants all about mine ears, And make me mine own patient. I'm faithful And secret, though a barber.

SHAPE. Nay, but hear me; He's very modest: 'twas his first attempt Procur'd him this infirmity. He will Be bashful, I am sure, and won't be known Of any such thing at the first. You must Be sure to put him to't.

CHIR. Let me alone: He knows not yet the world, I do perceive. It is as common now with gentlemen, As 'tis to follow fashion: only here Lieth the difference, that they keep in this A little longer. I shall have so much Upon your word, sir?

SHAPE. If you do perform The cure by that time, twenty pieces, sir: You are content?

MER. Yes, sir.

CHIR. It shall be done [_Exit_ SHAPE. According to your own prescription. Sit down, I pray you, sir: this gentleman Is a good friend of yours.

MER. Indeed he is a very honest man, As any one can wish to deal with, verily.

CHIR. Believe't, he loves you very well.

MER. I am most ready To do him any service truly. Pray you, Good brother, don't delay me: I'm in haste.

CHIR. _Indeed-and truly-verily-good brother!_ How could these milksop words e'er get him company That could procure the pox? [_Aside_.] Where do you feel You[r] grief most trouble you?

MER. I'm very well: what mean you, brother?

CHIR. Nay, be not so modest: 'Tis no such heinous fault, as that you should Seek thus to hide it; mere ill-fortune only--

MER. Surely you do forget yourself.

CHIR. Come, come, He told me you'd be shamefac'd: you must be Wary hereafter.

MER. I do perceive He is a little mad indeed: the gentleman Told me so much just as I came along. [_Aside._ Yes, yes, I will be wary; I'll take heed. Come, pray y', despatch me.

CHIR. So, I like you now. It is the custom of most gentlemen Not to confess until they feel their bones Begin t' admonish 'em.

MER. You are i' th' right. Good friend, make haste; I've very urgent business.

CHIR. Not rashly neither. Is your gristle sound? Methinks 'tis very firm as yet to the touch. You fear no danger there as yet, sir, do you?

MER. No, I'll assure you. He must have his humour: I see he is not to be cross'd. [_Aside._

CHIR. When did you Feel the first grudging on't? 'Tis not broke out In any place?

MER. No, no: I pray y', despatch me.

CHIR. These things desire deliberation; Care is requir'd.

MER. Good brother, go t' your chest.

CHIR. How can I know what med'cines to apply, If that you tell me not where lies your grief?

MER. Nay, good, now let me go.

CHIR. I must not, sir, Nor will not, truly. Trust me, you will wish You had confess'd, and suffer'd me in time, When you shall come to dry-burnt racks of mutton, The syringe, and the tub.[222]

MER. So: now enough. Pray fetch me what you promis'd.

CHIR. Are you wild Or mad? I do protest, I ne'er did meet A gentleman of such perverseness yet. I find you just as I was told I should.

MER. I lose the taking, by my swear, of[223] As much, whiles that I am receiving this.

CHIR. I will not hinder you, if that you do Prefer your gain before your health.

MER. Well then, I pray you tell it out: we tradesmen are not Masters of our own time.

CHIR. What would you have?

MER. What would I have? as if you did not know! Come, come, leave jesting now at last, good brother.

CHIR. I am in earnest, sir.

MER. Why, I would have My money, sir; the twenty pieces that The gentleman did give you order now To pay me for the velvet that he bought This morning of me.

CHIR. O, the gentleman----

MER. You should not make a laughingstock, good brother, Of one that wrongs you not; I do profess I wont be fubb'd, ensure yourself.

CHIR. The gentleman! O, O, the gentleman! Is this the cure I should perform? Truly I dare not venture Upon such desperate maladies.

MER. You are but merrily dispos'd?

CHIR. Indeed, they are Too high for my small quality. Verily Perhaps, good brother, you might perish under Mine hands truly. I do profess, I am not Any of your bold mountebanks in this.

MER. You're still dispos'd----

CHIR. To laugh at you, good brother. Gull'd, by my swear: by my swear, gull'd! he told me You had a small infirmity upon you, A grief of youth or two: and that I should Have twenty pieces for the cure. He ask'd you, If that you were content? you answered, yes. I was in hope I had gain'd a patient more. Your best way is to make haste after him.

MER. Now could I beat myself for a wise fool That I was, thus to trust him. [_Exit._

CHIR. B' w' y', brother. 'Fore God, a good one. O, the gentleman! [_Exit laughing._