Chapter 12

CONSCIENCE, PHILOLOGUS, SUGGESTION.

[CONSCIENCE.] Alas, alas! thou woful wight, what fury doth thee move So willingly to cast thyself into consuming fire? What Circe hath bewitched thee thy worldly wealth to love More than the blessed state of Soul, this one thing I desire? Weigh well the cause with sincere heart, thy conscience thee require, And sell not everlasting joys for pleasures temporal.[56] Resist Suggestion of the flesh, who seeks thee for to spoil; From which thou soon shalt go, or they from thee bereaved shall, And take from thee, which God elect, true everlasting soil. See where confusion doth attend to catch thee in his snare, Whose hands, if that thou goest on still, thou shalt no way eschew.

PHILOLOGUS. What wight art thou, which for my health dost take such earnest care?

CONSCIENCE. Thy crazed conscience, which foresee the plagues and torments due, Which from just Judge, whom thou denyest, shall by and by ensue.

SUGGESTION. Thou hast good trial of the faith which I to thee do bear: Commit thy safety to my charge; there is no danger near.

CONSCIENCE. Such is the blindness of the flesh, that it may not descry Or see the perils which the soul is ready to incur; And much the less our own estates we can ourselves espy, Because Suggestion in our hearts such, fancies often stir: Whereby to worldly vanities we cleave as fast as burr, Esteeming them with heavenly joys in goodness comparable, Yet be they mostly very pricks to sin abhominable. For proof we need no further go than to this present man, Who by the blessing of the Lord of riches having store, When with his heart to fancy them this worldling once began, And had this glass of vanities espied his eyes before, He God forsook, whereas he ought have loved him the more; And chooseth rather with his goods to be thrown down to hell, Than by refusing of the same with God in heaven to dwell.

SUGGESTION. Nay, hark, Philologus, how thy Conscience can teach, And would detain thee with glosings untrue: But hearest thou, Conscience, thou mayest long enough preach, Ere words, from whence reason or truth none ensue, Shall make Philologus to bid me adieu. What, shall there no rich man dwell in God's kingdom? Where, then, is Abraham, Job, and David become?

CONSCIENCE. I speak not largely of all them which have this worldly wealth, For why I know that riches are the creatures of the Lord; Which of themselves are good each one, as Solomon us telleth, And are appointed to do good withal by God's own word; But when they let us from the Lord, then ought they be abhorr'd: Which caused Christ himself to say, that with much lesser pain Should camel pass through needle's eye, than rich men heaven obtain. Hereby rich men Christ did not mean each one which wealth enjoy, But those which fast'ned have their love upon this worldly dust; Wherefore another cries and saith, O death, how great annoy Dost thou procure unto that man, which in his goods doth trust. That thou dost this, Philologus, thou needs acknowledge must; Whereby each one may easily see, thou takest more delight In mundane joys, than thou esteemest to be with angels bright.

PHILOLOGUS. This toucheth the quick: I feel the wound, which if thou canst not cure, As maimed in limbs I must retire; I can no further go.

SUGGESTION. This is the grief which Conscience takes against thee, I am sure, Because thou usest those delights which Conscience may not do; And therefore he persuadeth thee to leave the same also, As did the fox which, caught in snare and scap'd with loss of tail, To cut off theirs, as burthenous, did all the rest counsel.

CONSCIENCE. Indeed I cannot use those fond and foolish vanities, In which the outward part of man doth take so great delight: No, neither would I, though to me were given that liberty, But rather would consume them all to nought, if that I might; For if I should delight therein, it were as good a sight, As if a man of perfect age should ride upon a stick, Or play with compters in the street, which pastime children like. But all my joys in heaven remains, whereas I long to be; And so wouldst thou, if that on Christ thy faith full fast'ned were: For that affection was in Paul the apostle, we may see, The first to the Philippians doth witness herein bear. His words be these: O would to God dissolved that I were, And were with Christ: another place his mind in those words tell; We are but strangers all from God, while in this world we dwell. Now, mark how far from his request dissenting in thy mind, He wish'd for death, but more than hell thou dost the same detest.

SUGGESTION. The cause why Paul did loath his life may easily be assign'd, Because the Jews in every place did seek him to molest: But those which in this world obtain security and rest, Do take delight to live therein; yea, nature doth endue Each living creature with a fear, lest death should them accrue. Yea, the same Paul at Antioch dissembled to be dead, While they were gone who sought his life with stones for to destroy. Elias for to save his life to Horeb likewise fled, So did King David flee, when Saul did seek him to annoy: Yea, Christ himself, whom in our deeds to follow we may joy, Did secretly convey himself from Jews so full of hate, When they thought from the top of hill him to precipitate. Wherefore it is no sin at all a man for to defend, And keep himself from death, so long as nature gives him leave.

CONSCIENCE. The same whom you recited have conceived a further end, Than to themselves to live alone, as each man may perceive; For when that Paul had run his course, he did at last receive With heart's consent the final death which was him put unto. So when Christ had performed his work, he did death undergo: And would to God, thou wouldest do that, which these men were content; For they despised worldly pomp; their flesh they did subdue; And brought it under, that to spirit it mostly did consent: Whereby they, seeking God to please, did bid the world adieu, Wife, children and possessions forsaking; for they knew That everlasting treasures were appointed them at last, The which they thirsting did from them all worldly pleasures cast. But thou, O wretch, dost life prolong, not that thou wouldst God's name, As duty binds us all to do, most chiefly glorify, But rather by thy living still wilt God's renown defame, And more and more dishonour him: this is thy drift, I spy.

PHILOLOGUS. I mean to live in worldly joys; I can it not deny.

CONSCIENCE. What are those joys, which thou dost mean, but pleasures strange from God? By using of the which thou shalt provoke his heavy rod.

SUGGESTION. Tush! knowest thou what, Philologus, be wise thyself unto, And listen not to those fond words which Conscience to thee tell. For thy defence I will allege one worthy lesson mo, Unto the which I am right sure he cannot answer well: When David by vain trust in men of war from God sore fell, And was appointed of three plagues the easiest for to choose, He said: God's mercy easier is to get than man's, as I suppose. Again, he sayeth among the Psalms: it better is to trust In God, than that our confidence we settle should in man. Wherefore to this which I now say of force consent thou must; That when two evils, before us placed, no way avoid we can, Into the hand of God to fall by choice is lawful then, Because that God is merciful, when man no mercy show. Thus have I pleaded in this cause sufficiently, I trow.

CONSCIENCE. How can you say you trust in God whenas you him forsake, And of the wicked Mammon here do make your feigned friend? No, no; these words which you recite against you mostly make, For thus he thinks in his distress: God cannot me defend, And therefore by Suggestion frail to man's help he hath lean'd. Mark who say truth, of him or me, and do him best believe.

PHILOLOGUS. I like thy words, but that to lose these joys it would me grieve.

CONSCIENCE. And where Suggestion telleth thee, that God in mercies flow, Yet is he just sins to correct, and true in that he speak; Wherefore he sayeth: whoso my name before men shall not know, I shall not know him, when as judge I shall sit in my seat. This if you call to mind, it will your proud presumption break. Again he sayeth, whoso his life or goods will seek to save, Shall lose them all; but who for Christ will lose them, gain shall have.

SUGGESTION. What, did not Peter Christ deny, yet mercy did obtain, Where, if he had not, of the Jews he should have tasted death?

PHILOLOGUS. Even so shall I in tract of time with bitter tears complain.

SUGGESTION. Yea, time enough, though thou deferr'st until thy latest breath.

CONSCIENCE. So sayeth Suggestion unto thee; but Conscience it denyeth, And in the end what so I say for truth thou shalt espy, And that most false which Conscience shall in secret heart deny.

PHILOLOGUS. Ah, wretched man! what shall I do? which do so plainly see My flesh and spirit to contend, and that in no small thing, But as concerning the event of extreme misery; Which either study to avoid, or else upon me bring: And which of them I should best trust, it is a doubtful thing. My Conscience speaketh truth, methink; but yet because I fear By his advice to suffer death, I do his words forbear. And therefore pacify thyself, and do not so torment Thyself in vain: I must seek some means for to eschew These griping griefs, which unto me I see now imminent; And therefore will no longer stay, but bid thee now adieu.

CONSCIENCE. O, stay, I say, Philologus, or else thou wilt it rue!

PHILOLOGUS. It is lost labour that thou dost: I will be at a point, And to enjoy these worldly joys I jeopard will a joint.

[_Exit_ PHILOLOGUS _and_ SUGGESTION.

CONSCIENCE. O cursed creature, O frail flesh, O meat for worms, O dust, O blather puffed full of wind, O vainer than these all! What cause hast thou in thine own wit to have so great a trust, Which of thyself canst not espy the evils which on thee fall? The blindness of the outward man Philologus show shall, At his return unless I can at last make him relent; For why the Lord him to correct in furious wrath is bent.

[_Exit_ CONSCIENCIA.