Part 6

And such as use to jest at a man, be very like unto these: I meane them that have a good sport to mocke and beguile men, not in spite or scorne, but on a meriment alone. And you shall understand, There is no difference betweene a scorne and a mocke: but the purpose alone and intent a man hath, in the meaning the one or the other. For a man mockes and laughes otherwhile, in a sport and a pastime: but his scorne is ever in a rage and disdaine. Although in common speache and writing, wee take the one woorde sometime for the other. But He that doth scorne a man: feeleth a contentation in the shame he hath done him: And hee that dothe mocke, or but laughe: taketh no contentation in that he hath done: but a sport, to be merry & passe the time away: where it would be, both a greefe and a sorrow, perchaunce, unto him, to see that man receave any shame, by any thing he said or did unto him.

And althoughe I profited litle, in my Grammar in my youthe; yet I remember that Mitio, who loved Aeschines so muche, that he him selfe had wonder at it; yet other while, toke a sporte & a pleasure to mocke him: as when he said to him selfe: I will go to give him a mocke: so that, I must inferre, that the selfe same thing, done to the very selfe same body: according to the intent of him that doth it, may be either a mocke or scorne.

And bycause our purpose, cannot be plainely knowne unto other men: it shall not be good for us to use such parts, as bring men in doubt and suspicion, what our intent and meaning is in them: but rather let us eschewe them, then seeke to be counted Jesters. For, It many times chaunceth, in boording and Jesting, one tackes in sporte, the other strikes againe in earnest: & thus from playing, they come to fraying. So, he that is familiarly mockte in pastime, recons it, otherwhile, to be done to his shame & dishonour, and therat he takes a disdaine. Besides this, A mocke is no better, then a deceite. And naturally, it greveth every man to erre and be deceived. So that, many Reasons ther be to prove, That He that seekes to purchase goodwill, and be well thought of: must not make him selfe to cunning in mockes and Jestes.

It is very true, we are not able, in no wise, to leade this paineful life, altogether without some pleasure and solace: And bycause Jestes do geve us some sporte, and make us merry, and so consequently refreash our spirits: we love them that be pleasaunt, merry conceited, and full of solace. So that a body would thinke, I should rather persuade the contrarie: I meane, I shoulde say: It is convenient and meete in company, to use prety mockes, and otherwhile some Jestes and taunts. And without doubt, they that can stint after a friendly and gentle sort, be muche more made of, and better beloved then they that cannot skill or have no wit to doe it. Howbeit, it is needeful in this, to have a respect to many things.

And forasmuche as it is the intent of him that doth Jest: to make a sport and pastime at his faulte, whome he doth love and esteeme, and of whom he doth make more then a common account: it must be well lookte to, that the fault, wherin his friend hath fallen, be suche, as he may sustaine no slaunder or shame, or any harme by any talke or Jeste he makes uppon it: otherwise, his skil doth ill serve him, to make a good difference betweene a pleasaunt Jest, and a very plaine wronge.

And there be some men, so short & so testy, that you must, in no wise, be merry, nor use any jesting with them. And that can Biondello well tell, by Maister Philippo Argenti in the gallery of Caviccioli.

And moreover, It cannot be good to jeaste in matters of weite, and muche lesse in matters of shame. For, men will weene that wee have a good sporte (as the common saying is) to bragge and boast in our evill: as it is said, the Lady Philippe of Prato, took a singular pleasure and contentation in the pleasaunt & prety aunswer she made, to excuse her loose and wanton life. And therefore, I cannot thinke that Lupo of Uberti did any thing extenuat or lessen his shame: but rather increaste it greater, by the Jeste that hee made to excuse his faulte, and qualifye the opinion of his cowardly minde. For, where he might have kept him selfe safe without daunger in the castle of Laterin, wherein he was besieged round about, and shutte up: hee thought hee had plaide the man good inoughe, in that hee could say at the yealding it up: that "A wolfe doth not love to be besieged and shutte up." For, where it is out of time for to laughe, there to use any Jestes or daliaunce, it hath a very colde Grace.

And further, you shall understand, there be some Jestes y^t bite, & some y^t bite not at all. For the first sorte: let y^t wise counsell that Lauretta gave for that point, suffice to teach you: That Jestes must bite the hearer like a sheepe, but not like a dogge. For if it pinche, as the bite of a dogge: it shalbe no more a Jeste but a wronge. And the lawes almost in all countries, will, that who saith any villanie unto a man, shalbe grevously punished for it. And, perchaunce, it were not amisse, to provide with all, some sharp correction for him, that should bite in way of jesting, beyond all honest measure. But gentlemen should make account, that the lawe that punisheth wronges, extendeth as farre to jestes, and that they should seldome or very easily nip or taunt any man.

And besides all this, you must understand, that a jest, whether it bite, or bite not, if it be not fine & full of wit, men take no pleasure at al to heare it, but rather are wearied with it: or at least wise, if they doe laughe, they laughe not at the jest, but at the jester him selfe, that brings it forthe so colde.

And bycause, Jestes be no other thing but deceites: and deceite (as a thing that is framed of subtilenes & craft) cannot be wrought but of men, that have fine and redy wittes, and very present: therefore they have no grace in men that be rude, and of grose understanding: not yet in them alwayes, that have the best and floweing wittes: as, peradventure, they did not altogether become Master John Boccaccio.

But tauntes and Jestes be a special redines and aptnes of wit, and quicken the motions of the minde: wherefore they that have discretion, doe not in this point, consider their will, but their disposition of nature: and after they have once or twise tried their wittes, and finde them unfit for suche purpose: they leave to labour them selves any further in that kind of exercise: that it may not chaunce unto them, that hapt to the knight of the lady Horetta. And if you looke in to the maners of many, you shall easily see, this that I tell you is true: I say, that To Jest or to taunt, is not currant with every man that will, but onely with them that can. And there be many that for every purpose, have in their mouth redy, many of these wordes, which wee call Bicticcichi: that have no maner of sense or meaning in them. And some, that use very foolishly and fondly to chaunge Sillables into woords. And some you shall heare speake and make answer, otherwise then a man would lightly looke for, without any wit or pleasure in the world in their talke. And if you doe aske them, "Doue e il signore?" they answer againe. "Doue egli ha i piedi:" and likewise "Et gli fece unguer le mani con le grascia di signore Giovan Boccadoro. Doue mi manda egli? Ad Arno. Io mi voglió radere, Sarebbe meglio rodere. Va chiama il Barbieri. Et perrhe non il Barbadomani." Al which be to grose, to rude and to stale: and such were almost, all the pleasaunt purposes and jestes of Dioneo.

But I will not take uppon me at this time, to discourse of the best and the worst kinde of jestes, what they be: aswel for that other men have written treatises thereof much more lernedly and better then I can: as also, bycause jestes and tauntes, have at first sight, a large and sure proofe of their grace or disgrace: such, as thou canst not do much amisse in this point, w^tout thou stand to much in thy owne conceite, and think to well of thy selfe: for where the jest is prety and pleasaunt, there a man straite is merry, and shewes a liking by laughing, and makes a kinde of admiration of it. So that, where the company geves foorth no liking of thy sportes and conceites, by their mirthes and their laughing: hould thy selfe still then, and jest no more. For it is thy owne faulte thou must think, and not theirs that do heare the: forasmuch as the hearers, as it were allured, with the redie, pleasaunt, and subtile aunswers or questions (do what they can, will they or nill they) cannot forbeare their laughing, but laughe in spite of their teeth. From whom as from our right & lawfull Judges, wee must not appeale to our selves.

Neither must a man, to make other men merie, speake foule and filthie wordes, nor make ilfavoured gestures, distorting his countenaunce, & disfiguring his bodie: For, No man should, for other mens pleasures, dishonest & dishonour him self. It is an arte for a Juggler & jester to use: it doth not become a gentleman to do so. We must not then, imitate y^e common and rude behaviours of Dioneo. Madonna Aldruda Alzate La coda.

Nor we must not counterfet our selves to be fooles & unsavorie doltes: but as time & occasion serveth, tell some pretie tale or some news, never heard of before, he y^t can: & he y^t cannot, let him hold his peace. For, these be y^e partes of y^e wit: which, if they be sodain & prety, give a proofe & a shew of y^e quicknes of y^e wit, & the goodnes of y^e maners of him y^t speakes them: which thing doth verie much please men & makes them our lovers & friends. But if they be otherwise, they woorke them a contrary effect. For, a man would weene the asse would play his parte: or y^t some hody dody & louberly lout would friske and daunce in his doublet. There is another pleasaunte kind of communication, & y^t is when y^e pleasure & grace doth not consist in one merrie conceite alone, but in long & continued talke: which would be well disposed, wel uttered, & very wel set forth, to shew y^e maners, y^e fashions, y^e gestures & behaviours of them we speke, of so properly & lively, as y^e hearer should think that he heareth them not rehearsed, but seeth them with his eyes do those very things he heares them to speak of: which be very well observed by the gentlemen and gentlewomen both, in Boccace: although yet otherwhile (if I be not deceived) they do affect and counterfet, more then is sightly for a gentleman or gentlewoman to doe, like to these Comedie Players. And to doe this well, you must have the matter, the tale, or the story, you take uppon you to tell, perfect in your minde: and woordes so redy and fit, that you neede not say in the end: "That thing, and tother thing: This man, what doe you call him: That matter, helpe me to terme it:" And, "remember what his name is." For this is just the trot of the knight of the Lady Horetta. And if you doe reherse any chaunce, in which there be many speakers: you must not say, "He said and he aunswered:" bycause this worde (He) serveth for all men. So that the hearer that harkens unto it, is easily deceived, and forgets whome you meane. Then, it behoves them that discourse matters at length, to use proper names, & not to chaunge them after.

And more over, a man must beware that he say, not those things, which unsaide in silence would make y^e tale pleasaunt inoughe and peradventure, geve it a better grace to leave them out. As to say thus. "Such a one, that was the sonne of such a one, that dwelt in Cocomer streete: do you knowe him? he maried the daughter of Gianfigliazzi, the leane scragge, that went so much to Saint Laraunce. No? do not you know him? why? do you not remember the goodly straight old man that ware long haire downe to his shoulders?" For if it were nothing materiall to the tale, whether this chaunce befell him, or him: all this long babble, and fond and folishe questions, were but a tale of a Tubbe: to no purpose, more then to weary mens eares that harken to it, and long to understand the end. As peradventure our Dant hath made this fault otherwhile, where he sayeth:

"And borne my parents were of yoare in Lumbardie, And eke of Mantuaes soile they both by country be."

For, it was to no purpose, whether his mother were borne at Gazuolo, or ells at Cremona.

But I lerned once of a straunger, a Rethorician very lerned, a necessarie lesson concerning this poinct: that Men must dispose and order their tale, first with bynames, and then rehearse them (as neede is) that be proper. For, the bynames alwayes beare the respect of the persones qualitie: but the other are to be used at the Fathers discretion, or his whome they concerne.

And therfore, that bodie whome in your thought and imagination to your selfe, you doe conceive, might be Lady Covetousnes her selfe: in speache you shall call Maister Erminio Grimaldi: if suche be the common opinion, the countrie hathe of him. And, if there be no man in place where you dwell, so notoriously knowne as might serve the turne fit for your purpose: you must then imagine the case further of, and set him a name at your pleasure. It is very true, that With muche greater pleasure we harken and better beholde (as it were with our eyes) what soever is told us of men of our acquaintance, if the matter be suche as toucheth their maners: then what we doe heare of straungers and men unknowne unto us. And the reason is this: when wee doe knowe, that suche a man is woont to doe so: we doe easily beleeve, he hathe doone so indeede: and wee take asmuche knoweledge of him, as if wee were present: where it chaunceth not so with us, in the case of a straunger.

Our wordes (be it in longe discourses or other communication) Must be so plaine, that all the companie may easily understand them: and withall, for sounde and sense they must be apt and sweete. For if you be to use one of these two wordes: you shall rather say, Il ventre: then L'Epa. And where your country speache will beare it, you shall rather say: La Pancia, then il Ventre: Or, il Corpo. For, by these meanes you shalbe understoode, and not misse understoode, as we Florentines say, nor be darke and obscure to the hearers. The which thing our Poet, meaning to eschewe: in this very woorde it selfe (I beleve) sought to finde out another, not thinking muche of his paines (bycause it liked him wel) to seeke farre to borrow it els where. And said:

Remember how the Lorde a man was faine to be, For mans offence and sinne in Cloister of virginitie.

And albeit Dant the learned Poet, did litle set by suche kinde of rules: I doe not think yet, a man should allow well of him in doing so. And sure, I would not councell you to make him your Maister in this point, to learne A Grace: forasmuche as he him selfe had none. For, this I finde in a Chronicle of him.

"This Dant, was somewhat proude for his knowledge, scornefull and disdainfull, and muche (as Philosophers be) without any grace or courtesie: having no skill to behave him selfe in company."

But to come to our purpose againe: I say, our speache must be plaine: which will be easie inough to doe: if you have wit to choose those wordes that be naturally bred in our soile: and with all not so olde w^t Age, that they are become rotten and withered: and as overworne apparell, leaft of and cast a side. As, Spaldo, and Epa, and Vopo, and Sezzaio, & Primaio. And moreover, the wordes you shall use, must have no double understanding, but simple. For by coupling suche wordes together: wee frame that speache that is called Aenigma. And to speake it plainer in our owne language, we call it Gergo. As in this verse:

Io vidi un che da sette passatoi Fu da un canto all' altro trapassato.

Againe, our wordes would be, (as nere as they might be) aptly and properly applied to that thing we go about to deliver, & as litle as may be, common to other matters: for, in so doing, a man shall weene, the matter it selfe is openly laide before him: & that it is not expressed with wordes, but pointed foorthe with the finger. And therefore we may more properly say: A man is knowen by his countenaunce, then by his figure or counterfet. And Dant did better expresse the matter, when he saide,

"The weightes That peize the weight doe make the balance creeke,"

Then if he had saide

"Crie out and make a noise."

And it is a more proper and peculiar speache to say, The shivering of an ague, then to call it The Colde. And flesh that is Tidie, to terme it rather, Fatte: then Fulsome.

Ther be some woordes more in this place to like effect, which I meane not to stande uppon now: bycause our Englishe tounge cannot hansomely deliver their perfect meaning. For the Italians have (as we have, and all other Countreis ells as well as wee) certaine peculiar wordes and termes, so naturally and properly their owne, as it is not possible to expresse them aptly and perfectly in any other Language. And therefore the Author him selfe, fearing, or knowing asmuche in the sense of these wordes, which he hath inferred in this place (as it were preventing a blame) in maner excuseth and speaketh asmuch as I say, as the matter it selfe that insueth doth shewe. For, the Author him selfe following his purpose saithe thus.

"I am well assured, if some straunger should, unhappely for my credite, hit uppon this treatise of mine: he would laughe mee to scorne, and say that I taught to speake in riddles, or els in Ciphers. For as muche as these wordes, be almost so properly our owne, that other countries have no acquaintance with them: or, if they woulde use them, yet they cannot tell how to understand them. For, who is it that knowes what Dant ment in this verse.

Gia veggia per Mezzul perdere o Lulla.

"Sure, I beleeve no man ells but we that are Florentines can understand it. Notwithstanding, for any thing that I have saide, if there be any fault in this text of Dant: it is not in the wordes. But, if he have faulted, it is rather in this: that (as a man somewhat wilfull) he would take uppon him, a matter harde to be uttered in wordes, and per adventure unplesaunt to heare: then that he hath exprest it ill."

It is not then for a man to use any talke, with him that understandeth not that language you talke unto him. Nor yet, bycause a Douche man understandes not the Italian tounge, must wee (for that cause) breake of our talke, to holde talke with him, to make our selves counterfets, as Maister Brusaldo did, and as some other be woont, that fondly and coldly, without any grace, thrust them selves in to Chat in their language with whome they talke, what so ever it be, and chop it out every worde preposterously. And many times it chaunceth, the Spaniard talkes Italian with the Italian, and the Italian babbles againe in a bravevery and gallantnes, the Spanishe toung with the Spaniard. And yet, it is an easier thing to know, y^t they both talke like strangers: then to forbeare to laugh at the folish follies that scape them both in speache. Let us not therfore use our forreigne language, but when it is needefull for us to be understoode, for some necessitie or other, that appertaineth unto us: And in common use, use our owne tounge, thoughe not altogether so good: rather then a forreigne language, better then our owne that is naturall unto us. For a Lumbarde shall speake his owne tounge more aptly (which is, notwithstanding, but base and barbarous) then he shall speake the Tuscane, or other language: even bycause he hath not so redily, so proper and peculiar wordes, althoughe he studie much for them, as wee our selves that be Tuscanes.

But yet, if a man have a respect to them with whome he talkes: and for that cause forbeare & leave out those singular wordes, (which I have spoken of) and in stede of them use the generall and common: his talke, by suche meanes, shall have the lesse pleasure & delight.

Besides this, it becometh everie honest gentleman, to eschewe those wordes that have no honest meaning. And, The goodnes of wordes consisteth either in their sound, or pronouncing: or, in their sense and meaning. For as much as som wordes speake an honest matter, and yet, perchaunce, there is a certaine unhonest sense perceaved to stand in the pronouncinge of the worde it selfe: as Rinculare: which, notwithstanding, is daily used of all men. But if a man or woman should speake after this sorte, & at that verie warning doe it in sight of any (che si dice il farsi indietro) then would the grosenesse of the worde plainlie appeare unto them. But our Palate, throughe Custome and Use, happilie tasteth y^e wine (as it were) and the bestnes of the sense of the worde, and not y^e Dregges or Leeze.

She gave the Spanish figge with both her thumbes at once.

Saith Dant.

But our women, would be much ashamed to speake so: yea to shunne this ambiguous woord, y^t signifieth a worse matter, they rather say Le castagne. Albeit yet some of them at unwares, many times, name that unadvisedly, which if another man had spoken to trie them, would have made them blushe to heare that remembred in way of blasphemie, which makes them women. And therefore, suche as be, or would be better mannered or taught, take good heede they doe eschewe, not only things uncleane and unhonest, but woordes also: and not somuche those that be evill indeede, but those that may be, or doe but seeme to be unhonest, foule & filthie: as some men say these are of Dant.

She blewe large blastes of winde Both in my face and under.

Or els these.

I pray thee tell mee where about the hole doth stand.

And one of the Spirits said.

Then come behinde and where the hole is, it may be scand.

And you must knowe, that albeit two, or moe wordes, otherwhile chaunce to tell one selfe thinge, yet the one is more cleanly then the other. As for example, to say: Con lui giacque, & Della sua persona gli sodisfece. For this self same speach, if it were in other termes, would be to broad before & to filthie to heare it. And speaking of Endymion, you may more aptly say: Il Vago della Luna: then you can say Il Drudo, althoughe both these wordes doe import and signifie A lover, and a Friend. And a much honester speache is it, if you talke of Aurora, to call, her. Tritons prety gerle and lover, then Concubine. And it better becomes a mans and womans mouth, to call Harlots, women of the worlde (as Belcolore did, who was more ashamed to speake it then to doe it) then to use their common name: Thaide è la Puttana. And as Boccace declared y^e power of Meretrici and Ragazzi. For, se cosi hauesse nominato dall'arte loro i maschi, come nominò le femine; his talke would have byn foule & shamefull. And withall, A man must not alone beware of unhonest and filthie talke: but also of that whiche is base and vile, and especially where a man talketh & discourseth of greate and highe matters. And for this Cause, perchaunce, woorthely some blame our Beatrice, sayeing:

To passe throughe Lethes floud, the highest Fates would blott, If man mighte taste the Viandes suche, as there dooe fall by Lott, And not pay firste a due repentaunce for his scott.

For, in my conceite, these base wordes that come out of the Tavernes, bee verie uncomely for suche a worthy discourse. And when a man hathe like occasion to speake of y^e Sunne, it shall not be good to call it The Candell or the Lampe of the world: bycause such woordes do put us in minde of y^e Oyle, & the stuffe of the kitchin. Neither should a man that is well advised, say that Saincte Dominicke was Il Drudo della Theologia: Nor yet talke, that the glorious Sainctes have spoken suche base and vile woordes: As for Example to say.

And leave to scratche whereas the scabs of sinne breake out.

For they savour of y^e dregges, & y^e filth of y^e common people, as every man may easily see.